Wednesday, November 30, 2011

i dont handle stress well...


i dont handle stress well. so if you see me today and i look a little wack, it's because i'm not handling my stress so well. it could also be because i'm self medicating with coffee.
tomorrow we are summoned to court for an emergency hearing to grant UNSUPERVISED visits to baby J's birth mother. to add to the mess, we lost the judge that has been with the case since the beginning. aside from my selfish motives of wanting him forever, i'm scared for his safety. if those visits are granted he will be left ALONE with a registered sex offender. i can't let my mind go there.




my faith is being shaken, but my foundation is unbreakable.
i may have flinched. but i have not lost hope.

must.go.pray.must.go.beg.




'

Monday, November 28, 2011

the birth of kaleb...





the birth of kaleb took my faith to new heights. god knew i'd need the boost to continue in foster care.

kaleb is growing up...right in front of my eyes. he must have grown over night because he looks different today. stronger, smarter, bigger...

happy 4th birthday my boy.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

last week marked my daughters...


last week marked my daughters 5th year on this planet... It also marks our 5th year doing foster care. I didn't think I'd last a few weeks let alone 5 years. But. I fell in love with a blonde princess that i rescued from a pink castle high atop the koolaus...the rest is history.

So what have I learned...

I learned i must give grace to birth parents. They are hurting. Hurting people will try to hurt you. You are blessed so be a blessing...I know - easier said than done.

Also, Let yourself fall in love with your foster child. He deserves the unconditional love of a mother, even If it's gonna rip your heart out and send it through the meat grinder when he leaves.

And remember, you have no control. Not so good for the control freak mommas *raising hand*...Everything is left up to god...sure he puts social workers in the way but ultimately he calls the shots. surrender your children, worries and wishes to Him.

one last thing. there is no way i could be a successful foster parent without my family loving these children like their own. there is no way i could be successful without a community that encourages me. there is no way i can be successful without connecting with other foster/adopt families. so - thank you. thanks for everything. we're in this together.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

i wasn't with you...






I wasn't with you on the day you were born, we didn't meet till 9 days later. From what you tell me you were born with a crown, glowing yellow hair and a dragon was hiding you in a big pink castle. Sounds about right to me. Happy 5th birthday my princess.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

I HEART FACES - BLACK


i think this weeks challenge at i heart faces is a little.... challenging...

the theme for this week is black. There are already some great entries, so stop by to check them out.

so here is my submission. this hero. even superhero's have to eat.

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